Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Ang Email ng isang DOM - at ang reply (bow)

Mga Maxi-Friends, and those who made a voluntary exit sa bahay ni kuya (na ngayon ay pagmamay-ari na ni ate), I would just like to share a blog by my ever feisty assistant *Grey. (Coz she reminds me of the actress Jennifer Grey and she keeps on denying that she somehow resembles her).
Malamang you know who the DOM is. As in KingDOM animalia ang pinanggalingan nito kung bakit sobrang bilib na bilib sya sa sarili nya. Check out her reply (in bold). Wala nakong inedit dito because this was the way she has written it baka sa kalasingan o sa puyat kaya dun sa mga magbabasa at mag mo-mock lang ng ibang grammatical error, nobody’s perfect, leche!

—–Original Message—–
From: "KING KUPA"* [*]
Sent: Thursday, May 04, 2006 2:50 PM

Hi. I hope you’re doing great and feeling okay.  (what after getting this email? you have got to be out of your mind) Well, It’s been a while now since I e mailed you and expressed my intentions (yup, it has been a while, i agree. I actually thought your father, the prince of darkness, has finally asked you to stop roaming earth and get back down there in that towering inferno). It was a difficult decision to make considering the circumstances (***i heard that a reptile’s brain is the size of a pea. no wonder decision making must have caused you a debilitating migraine) I am fully aware of your inhibitions (wow, he must have scanned the entire thesaurus to find this word) and I feel the same (what? you also feel extreme disgust and fright when you look in a mirror? If yes, then, i totally agree… I feel the same way) … I share the same feelings as yours (sick to your stomach and near to calling a voodoo doctor to cast a spell on you? because that is EXACTLY how im feeling)… reluctant as well (so much for wishful thinking)… nonetheless, fear of rejection and inhibitions will not stop me from expressing my intentions for you (ay, hindi obvious, ah!).(kasing kunat ng balat mo, gurang), might be painful (i’d prefer an open heart surgery without anaesthesia than to be in the same room as you), difficult … i will try and will do my very best to prove my worth (you have already proven your worth. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING). I just wish that you will not doubt me and my feelings (HELLO?!? What is wrong with you, You effing maggot?!?). You can doubt me for the things that i have done, my experiences (huh? DI tayo close ha! pakialam ko kung anong napagdaanan mo.) but please never doubt my intentions for you (ano bang feeling mo? MU tayo???). I only have the purest intentions of you (kasing puro ng burak, kasing linis ng taong grasa… you have a family, for crying out loud!)… please believe me (ulol)… Its breaking my heart feeling that you are just ignoring my mails (buti nga sayo) … I haven’t recieved any response from you (helloooooo! una, RECEIVED yun hindi RECIEVED… basic spelling di alam. pangalawa, talagang wala kang marereceive na response sa akin, bwakanangsyet ka, dahil derecho sa basurahan ang mga emails mo. )… its ruining me learning that you’re having second thoughts bout me (anong second thoughts? wala ngang FIRST thought ano!?!)... All I need is an opportunity (wag kang magtatangka… bibigwasan kita)… please give me that chance to show you my sincerity… my worth… I would like you to know me better and me to really establish myself (nagawa mo na… at hindi ka nakakatuwa. letse!). Please dont be mad at me… (I’m not mad… Im beyond mad. i’m enraged, im disgusted, repulsed, … isa kang nakakarimarim na tao! Paksyet ka) Sincerely… (take this from a married guy proposing love to a girl young enough to be his granddaughter) Though it’s tough

Of course she didn’t reply this way. It was just in her blog. Though I wished she’d email this to him before her voluntary exit.
Patawarin mo ko I have to share this. Sobrang funny ka talaga!
Heads up peeps, her mother superior * Kristeta emailed DOM to stop harassing her or else, he will be reported to Management (as if naman hindi pa alam)… Bwahahaha! Buti nga sa kanya!
*Names changed for security reasons =p


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